When was the last time you had a heated argument? Why did it get so heated? What was accomplished?
Heated arguments start when both parties want to be right. Whenever I’m in a misdt of a heated debate, I can feel my heart rate increasing, my shoulders tense up, and my voice begins to rise. I can also feel when the other person starts getting defensive. At this point it becomes more of an emotional and egotistical battle where both parties are trying to prove each other wrong. Eventually, the debate ends with no consensus and bruised egos; not productive at all.
I found the better way to approach debates is rather than trying to be right, trying to be less wrong. If I feel myself getting defensive I’ll take a deep breath and relax. I’ll understand the other person’s point of view and acknowledge it. And I’ll admit when I’m wrong when it does happen, and it happens a lot. I found this way of approaching debates to be much more productive and insightful.